The art of compliments

Giving someone a compliment is the quickest way to boost someone's confidence, this is what I've been told all my life. Everyone likes to hear how smart, pretty, talented and sexy they are. Unless the sexy is accompanied with cat calls and is given by a group of sweaty men at a construction site, I digress. I give compliments all the time, I love it when people smile, I love it more if I had something to do with the smile.

I believe that compliment giving is an art, or at the very least; a talent. Not every one is adept at stroking egos, some compliments leave you cold. Imagine hearing this "you're so smart" smile, blush and do all coqquetish things girls are taught to do right and then "just like your sister, she's so hot where is she by the way" womp womp womp!

I don't know what it is, must be my new perfume but I've been getting a lot of these back handed compliments of late.

Conversation 1
P: Have you thought about kids?
Me: Yes, can't wait to have them.
P: They'll get the looks from me, what are you bringing to the table?
Me: Ah I don't know I can't even guarantee brains.
P: True they'll also get that from me. Babes you have to bring something to the table otherwise we'll have to revisit the contract.

Okay in the light of day there was actually no compliment in there. He boosted his own ego and completely confused mine. Presidents!

At work I get:

Conversation 2
78yr old engineer: My foster daughter's name is also Nono
Me: Pause
78yr old engineer: She's also black
Me: Pause
Then he walked out. I swear he was waiting for me to say thank you!

Conversation 3
Indian Lady: Nono's pretty for a black girl, like with eyes that small, a nose that big and lips that pouty you'd think it wouldn't work. But it does.
I laughed because really...? I thought she was joking, but apparently with features like mine I shouldn't own a mirror. But it works dear anonymous person from Conversation 1! It works!

Then I filed my nails, flicked my weave and winked at myself in the mirror because no one else gets the compliment thing quite like I do.

By the way, you're all just as beautiful as you were the last time we met up here.